She told me she got a 15 on her A.C.T.. that's when I knew it was a done deal.
like why cant he just admit that he still wants to fuck me even though im underage
she played "i just wanna get married" by jagged edge while we were having sex. why cant i avoid stage 5 clingers
I don't have any swimsuits that don't show off the weird handprint bruises on my hips. Do you have a onepiece I can borrow?
I started making breakfast to subdue the hangover and last of the shrooms and only got as far as eating a half frozen pierogi out of a dixie cup.
I dunno. Last time I went there I had got sexually propositioned by a Belgian prince.
siamese drinking twins saturday is a go ... bring duct tape.
yeah the little voice in my head screaming YOU NEED TO GET LAID eventually grew legs and started kicking me so to avoid brain damage i had to fuck him
I had a girl last night tell me that she was happy to find a condom wrapper in my garbage because,and I quote, "well at least you're not raw dogging every slore that crosses your path"
Well, most of my extended family doesnt know about my love for the penis, so they dont have a reason to disown me
btw I told him that the only way he was gonna get to eat you out was if he smothered your vag with grits..
i actually texted him "nice to see you" but then there was a saved draft "i think about you when i get off." dodged that bullet...
My car windows are covered in lube. Happy 4th of July!
Everything was going well until he very loudly said that he wanted to cum on my fingernails.
'allo, good sire. how dost thy day goeth?
oh no. you're at that weird Renaissance Festival thing again, aren't you?
I am an inebriated elf. you may fucketh off.
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