He had some BAD nuttage
Nuttage?
It's like cleavage......... but different
Don't take this the wrong way but I just mistook a trash can for you
i told you the emergency thong was a good idea.
Saw a guy throw up on himself while walking, drinking, and singing all at the same time. Hope your night is going better than his :)
Everyone in the office is in total denial. I asked my boss what he did this weekend and he said "nothing much." But I know we were both thinking about the orgy.
You made out with a guy who refers to his cock as "rafiki." Are you proud of yourself?
Could have been worst, could have seen me bent over biting her carpet while her son was inside me, i think i would have respnded with "i was just trying to be quiet"
I can't wait till we are old and wrinkly and I can turn to you and ask, "Remember when you Rick Jamesed the shit out of that couch??"
not sure when or how we ended up at this wedding party but you need to be here they are handing out screwdrivers and Yamakas to everyone and it's a got damn open bar you need to be here now
ALSO I MAYBE ACCIDENTALLY HAND CUFFED MYSELF TO A CHAIR
her fuck buddy was butt ass naked in our kitchen making waffles but they tasted so bomb
Congratulations! We have a period
How can i make it up 2 u?
DREW I AM SMOKING POT AND FUCKING. WE CANNOT DISCUSS THIS AT THIS PARTICULAR JUNCTURE.
its official, you're fucking me on my lunch break. the only thing I want in my mouth is your dick. pick me up at noon.
want fries with that?
Have I told you i love you?
there's no need we are two peas in a naughty pod of fuckery
Randomize
