he had two deer mounted on his dorm room wall with panties and bras hanging from the antlers... i cant believe i contributed to bambi's headgear...
one of my coworkers is shitshow drunk, getting naked. she's about to ride the bull.
i was just going to ask if it would be cool for me to come and have a beer...
it's total chaos here. i may ride the bull... i'll be visible.
It's like the only way I know how to apologize is by giving a blow job.
I don't have a choice really. It's either lose 15 lbs by Halloween, or I'm going as a giant banana.
Yeah, all the sudden I heard a loud "ding" and realized I had been passed out on the dorm elevator for about an hour....
I'm having a self conscious moment and I need your complete honest opinion of my boobs.
If she says "This is how acid feels" one more time I'm never trip-sitting them again.
Huh interesting. Well thats too bad. Did he catch on?
I doubt it. After sex he sat there naked until the episode of fresh prince (which had JUST started) was over.
So I put a beer on your bed and jumped on th3 other side of the bed like in the commercials. You my good sir, owe me a budweiser that your bed drank.
Showed up physical therapy hammered. The therapist just says this isnt part of the program.
I'm trying to find some better sex background music so his neighbors don't hate us. This is tedious.
I CAN SPEAK THE LANGUAGE OF THE ANIMES.
3 cups of coffee and some molly. The "Tay's Day Off Diet"
what is considered shitting yourself?
Like my underwear wasn't soiled, but there was definitely a departure from my asshole.
it was awkward when he was taking off my clothes and i had to help him undo my fanny pack
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