That was a long time ago. She needed the money.
Nice meating you last night
Not a typo
i effing cant stand that stupid soul the new way to roll hamster commercial. everyone im with is laughing and now hate them all.
What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
there was 4 little kids screaming in high pitched voices at the top of their lungs at the sox game and their mom just leaned over to me and said 'if thats not birth control i dont know what is'
Maybe he just has a boisterous penis
I just want you to know the floor between our rooms isnt sound proof "Captain Cock"
How do I tactfully ask if the neighbors downstairs can hear me beating it?
there are ass prints on the hood of my car.
juast therw a cheeeeesestirng over the fnce. stuckit to sombodys car winheild... gonna luagh if i find it mlted in the mrning.
officially hit rock bottom.. been yelling through the vent in my room to my little brother trying to convince him to get me water for the past two hours. i fear feeling the full effect of my hangover if i stand.
YOU WERE HAVING SEX IN THE SAME BED I WAS SLEEPING IN. AND YOU GRABBED MY HAIR. OF COURSE I'M PISSED.
Come now. I'm bloody but I'll give you the best fuck of your life.
I feel like I may be the only person who can say they crutched their walk of shame. past the secret service.
If you had a good reason for throwing the toaster at the wall, now's a good time to tell someone. My parents are on their way back and you know my dad and his pop tarts.
Randomize