Well, I fucked her. But the sex wasn't all that great. Morning sex never is
do you think he would believe thats it not really my period, and that i ate a lot of licorice?
Just used my last prints at the library for brackets instead of final reviews. Hello March.
Worst part of St. Paddy's...me drunkenly crying to a U2 cover band.
theyre doing DJ Khaled impressions again...
They were done having sex when I went to the room. They had that look on their faces.
Disappointment?
They thought we spoke German and French even though we just kept repeating "I give to you a cat" and "Are you drunk?"
It's cheaper then a lap dance and you get your hair cut.
My mom slipped a condom in my pocket along with a sticky note that said "be safe sweetie."
A beer is a heart your wish makes!!!
I'm not sure what step "make amends" is, but my phone is on
Like I cant decide if he's like autistic or something or just seriously cock blocks himself on purpose with this shit
Nate is still in lock up because when the cop informed me he'd shit his pants in the squad car I declined to post bail.
I don't feel like that was meant as a compliment, but really still feels like one
His penis is average but his stamina is amazing!!! I didn’t know I had that many orgasms in my body!!!!
Randomize