I'm so horny!
I'm so hungry
WHAT A TERRIBLE REPLY!
For your pussy...
so... how was it???
he had bart simpson sheets. he had itunes on shuffle and "don't worry be happy" started playing when he took his boxers off. sad to say i was neither worried nor happy
she claims you yelled BOMBS AWAY when you came. tell me she's lying
but she didn't tell you i squeezed, built up pressure, and napalmed her face as i yelled it, did she
**i WaNt TO sLaP mY niECe wHO ThINks iT iS cUte tO WriTE LiKE tHiS**
Sometimes I forget to take my socks off when I masturbate. This always makes me feel like I'm accidentally in a porn.
To think... Somewhere, too drunk by buckcherry is someone's theme song
Well i just learned hong kong is a country...thank you olympics
oh god was she eating orange peels again
The secrurity code on my debit card is 420, can not lose this card.
Need. Hospital. Physically am floating.
He got kicked out 3 times. I have no idea how he kept getting back in. I saw him walking on the highway the next morning.
i didnt realize that your first thought would be SEXUALIZING BREAD
Starting to realize that fucking everyone I come across isn't the most... "adult"... coping method.
Good Morning! You are sterile right?
I'm hungover from the 8pm vodka and still drunk from the 5am beer.
Randomize