The world would be so much better with thought bubbles.
I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! Live in the flesh!
we should wear snuggies to the strip club
and I asked her"are you allergic to condoms latex like your older sister " she said "Idk this is gonna be my 1time"
Everything is bigger in Texas. Including Colt's vagina.
He walked in and put an x made out of tape on the floor. He then announced that he was going to pass out there. Cocky or strategic?
this boner is fucking legendary. i should name it and celebrate its birthday every year
DID YOU JUST COME OUT THROUGH A FACEBOOK COMMENT??
I opened a jar of Ragu so I could use it as a cup. You tell me how it's going.
Can you pick me up a bottle of make-an-ass-of-myself tonight?
Do you want cuervo gold or silver?
We went to the casino to try to earn enough money to go to new Orleans comfortably. I'm already drunk. This is a horribly immoral start to summer.
We found him in the neighbors shed using a bicycle as a blanket. We just left him there.
sending him nudies in gran's hospital bathroom. you?
I hate that I still want him to look at me as the vagina that got away.
You talk the same way I hallucinate.
Randomize
