We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
But he was like 75 and lives right near mom and dad. Not a threat at all.
Excuse me? I'm weird? You're the one sticking your penis into a pringles can.
i found your underwear in my bra... i dont even remember how this happened.
shit. all i remember is the look on your moms face.
I mean we've tried to get high on nutmeg, we clearly dont know the definition of "too far"
Even his old football coach jokes about how big it is. I don't want to be alone in a room with him and that monster.
Three questions... How drunk were you? How long until we can make fun of you for this? Do you even really need a spleen?
Do Not. I repeat. DO NOT DRINK WHISKEY TO COPE. You will end up in jail. LEARN FROM THE PRO
nah we got kicked outta the bar after the bouncer saw us putting straws up Chelsea's nose to make her look like a walrus after she fell asleep at the table
My password hint says "not sunset, also facebook." i need to stop doing computer things while high. I will never figure this clue out.
My way of showing team usa support, bronze: handy silver: bj gold: home run. God, I'm patriotic
So I had sex in a bulldozer lastnight now that's definitely a first...
She's been drunk for three days now
Like three straight days. 72 hours
She's been covered in glitter for the last two and somehow she found a monkey
Tried to put an eye patch on while hooking up with a girl. She was not amused.
You're breaking my sexual little heart
I don't want to go to sleep. I like partying with myself.
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