hey no worries the mystery has been solved- i jst sneezed and my undies popped outta my nose.
Nothing like studying in the College of Communication to make you realize how smart you are.
Pillow talk just revealed that he originally thought I was 16.
I woke up tied to the door handle with reindeer patterned socks. You can tell it's Christmas.
It's just a matter of time. The ball is in my court. Soon to be in her mouth.
We had sex under a tree in his boss's backyard, then I hooked up with his best friend. I don't even care how I got home.
You're just horny.
Yea, and? I appreciate you as a person too if that helps.
Fucking someone because they own a lava lamp is like fucking someone because they have 20 dollars and no concern for their house burning down.
I'm in my bed. Snow angles in fresh sheets. don't even try to get me out tonight.
I wanted to get all my legit stuff out, but then I decided I didn't trust drunk me with my own things
Good decision.
Aaand now my client contact has seen your boobs.
Lesson learned. No more vodka and toaster strudel
So I paid Bumble $10 to see who liked my profile for a month. Cheap, easy dick. It's all about the economics, yo.
He went down on me while i ate a whole 7/11 pizza. New level unlocked
I got home and he was wearing a suit. He said he reason was because it was shirt and tie Saturday and that he won't change until midnight. He then proceeded to answer the door in a British accent.
Randomize