Don't tell me wow. Tell me this is normal for college and in no way am I a whore.
the ceiling is raining jello shotss
It's okay, I climbed on the roof of the bar to get my shoe back. This may become a Saturday tradition. I'll keep you updated
Our logic class started an hour ago, I walked out and found my sister drunk, sitting down, eating m&ms, afraid to walk in... I want her life
Dude shes not that fat. Plus, last night I probably would've done it too.
Dude, the lecture theatre is caving in on me.
My mouth taste like pussy and my dad noticed. Hahahaha
High me just had to pick the lock on my sisters room because I locked my vodka in there. I love vacation.
Definitely broke my toe and messed up my knee walking back. Drink hitch hiking should never happen again.
Our DD will meet us there. The strippers are sending a limo to pick him up. He promised them New Years Eve massages. Said he would still drive us home.
My goal in life is to ruin sex for someone. To be so mindblowingly unreal that they can never find anyone like me ever again. So far it's going well.
the girl next to me was drawing sonic the hedgehog on her exam what the fuck
godspeed
Got arrested last night. My cell mate just added me on Facebook.
Were not even through the second month of the year and I potentially may have torpedoed a marriage...
When we sit on the couch watching TV, she always cups her hand around my balls. Not sure if it's a sign of affection or a "power play" to remind me just how vulnerable I am if she chooses to make an aggressive squeeze.
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