You Definitely drank the goldfish bowl like it was a giant margarita
What are these yellow papers in the kitchen?
These are the tickets we got last night.
Did i sign this one as Grizzly Bear?
Yes...yes you did.
I bet the first cavemant to make fire got so much pussy
i knew she was desperate at the point in which she started showing me her naked pics on her phone
I was. I was trying to blow bubbles in the toilet after I threw up in it. They had to carry me everywhere. I lost a sock.
I am drinking at a movie theater seeing a children's movie, 2nd time this week
My walk of shame got a new perspective when I walked into his livingroom and found his roommate fucking some chick on the coffee table.
Gave the kid in the wheelchair at the bus stop a beer and proceede to lift him on the bus. porch drinking brings out the best in everyone
you have failed as an in class drinking partner.
just watched my roommates get stoned and jury rig a pulley system to pass the bowl back and forth across the room.
Either of you know why the shower was on and the bathroom door wide open with no one in there at 6 in the morning?
Dilemma. I'm out of wine and I can't put on clothes to go to the liquor store bc I just got spray tanned. If this isnt white girl problems I don't know what is.
I was informed this morning that I took all my clothes off and ran around the whole apartment complex. Being as they just moved in, welcome to the neighborhood.
He's going to be in the air guitar championships in june. Need I say more.
send nudes
from the living room?
Randomize
