Those former-lesbian gone white-trash bars always seem to be your favorite.
i dont care that its taken 20 hrs to pee without hurting, BEST HATE SEX EVER.
is it a bad thing if he can only get off when i start talking like one of the girls from Jersey Shore??
saw a pregnant woman in a bridal gown standing on the side of the road while her car was getting searched by police....cheers to new beginnings
I had his cock in my mouth and he still wouldn't shut up about Star Wars.
It' a whole new level of walk of shame. I'm carrying his sheets since I have a washer/dryer.
The only reason I give him head is because I know i'll get a back rub.
wow.
But it's a REALLY good back rub.
tonight i'm going for the "i fuck with the lights on" look
it's only monday and im already failing all my classes. i give up. tequila tuesday is my only friend.
rolling absolute tits, turn on the red lights for when i get home.
You could make a naked club. One member, you. One president, you.
you can only text me tonight if its in drake lyrics. thats the rule
I flashed the bar tender last night. Apparently I wanted a whiskey to go and that was the golden ticket. This is why I never come home
Nothing says I love you like a silicone dragon dick
All I know is that I have a black eye and an extra $200 in my wallet. Other than that, clueless.
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