I'm waiting for seagulls to eat this throw up
these burps are starting to have way more vomit in them,
im pretty sure i just dented her unborn child.
just googled chastity belt to see if it really exist..
all a guy has to do is give me sprinkles and cookies and they can get me in bed
Is it cum slut, cumslut or cum-slut? Sexting, plz advise ASAP
I am now trying to reassure her that she doesn't have a wide-set vagina. So thanks, for whatever you said.
Which is worse rug burn on your nipples or laying there after wondering how long you have to cuddle before you can sneak away?
Teflon bitches. Nothing fucking sticks to this kid, not even a kid. Maury Povitched this shit outta that situation.
Just used the "Buddy" Poppy flower I got from a veteran to clean my one hitter. "I'm proud to be an American"
I tried to put my heels in the coat check
Definitely ended up doing Coke with Chewbacca in the porta potty behind the haunted house.
It's the never-ending clusterfuck that is my love life
Like, I don't need to know your life dude. I just need you to suck my tits.
Hes back in his dorm room dancing naked with 3D glasses on.
and he said that acid doesnt really do anything to him...
Randomize
