i half slept with him but i still dont owe you any money
who said I'd never amount to anything...i just won 'most enthusiastic' at my poledancing class
Road trip to buy me a baby zebra..are you in or are you in?
I hope after we constantly bang for 2 days straight we can agree to be friends again
just woke up in a camero on the way to nebraska, i would appreciate it if you answered your phone.
I am compiling a playlist that reminds me of all my best sexual encounters. It shall be called THE MUSIC OF MY VAGINA'S PEOPLE
I think his roommates are using word magnets to tell me that they can hear us. His fridge currently says, "Chris ate out naughty girl."
And I told him that even though were not together, if he has sex with anyone I would have sex with someone else, video tape it and send it to him.
I decided staying home, watching porn and masterbating was a much better choice than the gym. And I was right.
Can I borrow you for, like, thirty minutes so you can lay on one boob and rub the other until I fall asleep?
Sounds like either a very good Friday night or a very bad Saturday morning.
Just ate Panda Express. Fortune cookie had no fortune in it. I actually prefer this. Less broken dream potential.
If y'all wanna know how far the apple fell from the tree I'm sexting during Easter service. Mom would be so proud 😳
Recliner chair sex has moments of worry....just don't.
My body isnt used to all this fresh air, sun and booze....ok well maybe just the fresh air and sun...its used to the booze.
Randomize
