What would you say if someone told you they liked your lips?
Which ones?
what has become of my life if the best thing thats happened to me this week is that i discovered my cleavage as the best hiding spot ever for weed.
I use him for alcohol and he uses me for sex. This is the closest thing to love i could imagine
ONE NIGHT STAND. You have 27 minutes before the offer expires, so I suggest you hurry.
Fastest blow job ever. Though it was probably a good thing since we were in front of my house.
You were basically naked. Just covered in pink duck tape and feathers. I'd have to say this is beyond the slutty mark..
I just had someone I don't even know on Facebook message me saying it seems like I drink too much and should slow down.
Made a vodka juice box out of a ziploc bag and a straw for when I drive. Doesn't count as an open beverage container anymore.
I will give you 100$, a blow job a day for a month and I will shave my legs according to societal standards until next November if you come recuse me from my night class right NOW.
I'm at his house right now making him pancakes to compensate for YOU not giving him a handjob last night. You're welcome.
Dad and I are shitfaced screaming at Canadians in Walmart. Life is good.
I've noticed we have slowly begun to phase the "B" out of our Bromance.
Just walked in on him banging another girl. He told me " sorry but I'm gonna finish now that I'm caught" ...... I think this is the reason god gave me four older brothers....
My previously white toilet seat is now hot pink. I'm not sure why or how but I know it's your fault.
It was a glorious ass. He has amazing hands. I want to fuck him until he can't do math anymore.
Randomize
