she cant drink. allergic to alcohol.
ewwww. she might as well have a dick.
how do you clear previous safari searches on an iPhone? i asked my brother to google something for me and "big penis" "empire chinese food" and "reverse cowgirl" popped up.
All I did today at work was try to remember in vivid detail what your cock looks like.
I just hemmed my dress for halloween, never felt more like a man
you were crying because peter frampton wasnt your dad
Nada. Shooting off confetti and wanted to see I'd u could see it from ur house.
Wow. Its not even 11am.
successfully started a charcoal grill with 2 shots of everclear and some aluminum foil. i never wanna leave here
So can we talk about how we all three made out with the bike taxi driver in lieu of paying him. I'm not even mad, that's resourceful. You know what married girls would have had to do? They'd have had to pay.
When he left he said something to the effect of "well now that I've been used..." I think he may be on to me.
When he grabbed my tits it felt like he was either giving me a mammogram or trying to pierce my nipples with his fingers.
found out that hot proper business chick in my class A) did a bar crawl last 2 night and still showed up to class and B) is 19 and C) so not as proper as I thought D) is single. How the fuck does that work? Freaking superwoman.
I had to steal sneakers from my man of the night. I dipped. But then realized I left my purse in his house. So I had to stash the shoes in some bushes and wait for him on the stoop. Then after he watches me leave, I run back and get the shoes cuz I didn't wanna be taking my hour long journey home through London at 3 pm in my six inch wedges and club dress
I saw this news story about two naked Satanists being arrested so I thought I should ask if you need bail money or pants
barely 48 hours and I've done the dirty on both of my roommates beds before they've even slept in them
I don't know what you're doing this morning, but obtaining Plan B is my number-one priority.
Randomize
