Ryan Ross and Jon Walker left panic at the disco today.
I predict a mass suicide of the 14 year old girl population...
kindergarten is hard when you're hung over.
yeah. pants. i need to put pants on. i didn't do that last night. big mistake
he keeps calling me but I'm too scared to answer... Not sure what he's gonna yell at me for: barging into his room while he was with another girl, filling her shoes with dog food and water, or hiding his keys in the garbage disposal.....
Ihop lady gave me free pancakes for being sober this time
What can I say, he stumbled upon the key to my heart: orgasms and mac 'n cheese.
Being drunk at the hospital is better than i expected. I got to hide and play in the little kids waiting area. Btw no one is hurt
You were Q-tipping mashed potatoes out of your ear.
Basically as long as the fan is pointed at my vagina i can cool off enough to sleep.
it was good sex until i became a rubber doll and he became a jack hammer, so i guess overall it was good
My boss just sent an employee on an hour long paid break to pick up weed for our 'staff meeting' tomorrow morning.
There's nothing wrong with using cocaine to keep my heart rate up in my fitness class.
I'm in the liquor store and fucking "Wannabe" by the Spice Girls is playing. IM ALREADY ASHAMED OF MY REASON FOR BEING HERE, GIVE ME A BREAK.
so all I remember is hig-fiving the cop and then sprinting away. considering I'm not in jail, I count that as a win.
I had to pee so bad that I snuck into the bathroom while they were in the shower. At her request, he was massaging her boobs so they could grow faster. Also there was a laser light machine.
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