as soon as you compare a person to an animal, all sexual interest is out the window
I just found your credit card inside the bag of chips
I wish I could save this moment forever and have sex with it regularly. Its just tht beautiful.
I'm thinking about that time I was in a trashbag and you spray painted my hair yellow
you spent the night getting lap dances from a stripper with a c-section scar then ended up at a one room casino by the airport and you say you're too good to blaze and see pirahna 3d? bullshit
Abby. I can text perfectly. I pledge allegiance to the flag of the united states of america. and to the republic, for which we stand, one nation under god indivisible and with liberty and justice for all god bless america
But i don't feel like talking to him right now. I woke up an hour ago to a picture of his penis and I AM NOT A MORNING PERSON.
I feel like his dick looks like a decorative autumn squash.
I tried to make friends with the geese living behind Hughes. They didn't really like that idea.
Are you high?
You. Me. Frosting and a bed. Lets do this.
And on that day, Satan said; "Let there be the friend zone and let us get fucking high." while Jesus silently cried in the background.
The zoom feature on snap chat videos is the worst thing to ever happen to sexting
The first time he ever tried to hold my hand, I moon walked away.
I just ate part of my sock, this has got to stop.
So I realize somewhere between mildly irritated and outright belligerently pissed is where you are, but as to location, where are you?
Randomize
