The only way im leaving this casino is in a golden chariot or an ambulance
you went up to him and asked if you could have "friend sex." He looked like a 7 year old on christmas morning
You stood up gave the stripper 15 ones in a wad, hugged her and then sat back down.
just wrote a 6 page paper on my blackberry. including 3 sources. college is teaching me good things so far.
Apparently she doesn't appreciate the significance of eskimo sisterhood as much as I do.
Nothing kills the mood when I am hooking up on the dance floor like the DJ saying Happy Valentines.
I think I found out what we're going be for Halloween....Alcohol poisoning victims.
Im the proud new owner of the campus speed bump sign
............HELP Ive been abducted by vodka and its poisoning my brain fat chicks are getting cute and i slept with my sisters friend who slightly resembles john kerry....,,help
On our way there. Drinking my beer out of a coffee pot. Cuz it's my bday
I threw up in a Buffalo Wild Wings and then got a high-five. I really don't understand America
Think of all the island guys I could have. Ah well.
You can not bait me into a "how Stella got her groove back" call and response.
I don't know if I want to fuck him or punch him in the face.
Come share oat with me in your robe
When the stripper from this weekend is your cashier at Publix the next day 😐💀#pensacolaproblems
Randomize
