I feel like a panda just shit rainbows on my mind
his ringtone is the jonas brothers. get me the fuck out of here NOW.
he was wearing 3D glasses the whole time.
I knew he was a nice guy, because when we switched positions he flipped the mattress so I wouldn't have to lay in a pool of his sweat.
I am seriously considering thanking Macallan 18 in my thesis acknowledgments.
I locked the porch door but I left a spare key on top of the keg on the side of the house
fun fact #6 about tuesday nights: giving head with two 40s taped to your hands is not as easy as you would think
You should have hard cock pics on hand to send in the situation that you can't stop driving, pull out your cock, browse the countless pics I've sent you of my tits, get him hard and text a pic through. I mean, it's simple sexting ettiquette.
I just got three pairs of underwear free and a bathing suit for $20 by modeling them and letting the salesman grope me a bit.
It's great being a young gay man in Chicago!
So the day after the 4th I'm sitting here drinking Molson and watching NHL free agent frenzy. From patriotic American to drunken Canadian in 24 hours flat. Booyah.
He called me Kitten either just because or he figured out my old s&m life. Either way huge turn on.
You tipped the Uber driver extra for taking your phone away while you were drunk texting
Watching the series finale of Friends and crying in my Thai food. I don't like hangover Jared.
I hate who I am becoming
I think of it as growth but I also hate who I am becoming as well
I hate when I'm sexting and I make a typo.
You just killed the sext mood.
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