her fupa was seducing me. this is the last time i'm doing shrooms.
we turned studying into a drinking game, she drinks when she gets it right, i drink when she gets it wrong. so we'll be out soon
You know you hit rock bottom when you make out with a guy named after a cereal.
The best was having to tell my 16y/o cuz and her bf that we could see him fingering her in the inner tube. Lucky for them, I'm the cool cousin... and was river-level fuckedup.
You two kept repeating the same thing over and over. It was like looking after retarded pull-string dolls.
I will never swim in a flooded basement again..
there's a guy in the del taco parking lot doing pushups. let's be his friends
They usually take it with their boobs. It's like a horizontal motorboat
Oh fuck. There is like a human shit on the sidewalk. I hate this place.
We can stop fighting if you send me a picture of your dick standing at full attention wearing a sock.
I'll wait.
It can also be a hat.
Did we really just set fireworks off in a cemetery? Or was that a dream?
I think so and I think we were sober.
Just had sex in the room next to my parents. Heading back to school ASAP.
Power lunch with dad, pain pills and tequila shots. Dad does Monday hard.
Stranded. In bathroom stall. No toilet paper. I repeat NO TOILET PAPER! Assistance needed asap. GO! GO! GO!
Sober sex is weird like I didn't expect this when I got clean
Randomize
