is sleeping with your Political Science professor Politically incorrect?
Was he helping you 'cram' for your final, or just giving an oral exam?
That's what happens when you let Keystone Light make your decisions.
I was so hungover I threw up on her when she answered the door. i don't think it was a good first impression
Sooo sorry about that. And crying. And comparing my life to a duck
that's what penises do
they tell lies.
This went bad. Everyone is crying, i dont know why and I am really uncomfortable.
You rolled out of the car, got on all fours and puked then just nonchalantly stood up and waved goodbye and thanks for the ride.
They let me out of the holding cell just in time for me to get the morning-after-pill. Rock bottom feels even worse with all those hormones.
I have an excuse to be a whore in Mexico. I'm conducting an experiment to see if small dicks are caused by the poor drinking water.
I also was calling every child by their name "Birthcontrol" - straight people are fun
I'll just be here. Naked. Eating tots and jello like a muh fuggin G
Oh my God, that is a gorgeous man. And I wasn't even gay until five minutes ago.
I can wear a rubber suit at three am and spank someone's ass until its sore and fuck them three ways from Sunday. And get up the next day and do their laundry. As long as once in awhile they rub my back without expecting anything
I agree with that homeless guy though, you do need a haircut
He showed me his sex playlist and it looked good, so I slept with him.
Randomize
