Yeah, we realized keeping you in a cage wasn't beneficial to us
We pay for beer, you give birth. It's how the world works.
Its kinda awkward hearing him say the food taste like ass considering what he did last night.
I just wanna not walk straight. Is that too much to ask for?
He blow dried my hair while I sucked his dick. Now THAT'S fucking teamwork.
ummm i just drove by ur house and ur passed out on the porch. please call me when u get this
Currently flirting with a 57 year old. Why do i do this
oh my god. separately texting an Allie and an Ally while drunk is hard, and I'm climbed 1/2 way up a bridge pier.
We're at the hospital. She got a head rush and fell and now blood everywhere. Smoke the rest, just save her a bowl
I just burped jalapeños and cum. That was the most disgusting thing ever.
Beautiful wedding. Beautiful bride. I got shitfaced. Came home and ate two corndogs. I'm still single.
No I just rolled on the floor giggling. I think that's the equivalent to a post sex victory dance.
Letting Freddy Krueger eat me out = HAPPY HALLOWEEN TO ME!!!
This is like 50 shades on steroids but with healthy relationship models and mutual respect among all parties involved and lesbian activity.
we should paint friendship bongs
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