oh. my. god. the guy i hooked up with last night is currently wearing a dress.
it actually wasnt that awkward...i planned on saying hello and walking away..then she asked if i wanted to go to lunch and i looked at her chest and said absolutely
My room should be renamed "Land of the Misfit Condoms."
i just watched a special on porn, the business isn't doing so good. You may want to wait before you start your career
Why is the word 'best' written on my chest?!!
Basically as long as the fan is pointed at my vagina i can cool off enough to sleep.
i'm only riding in the trunk because they put the case of beer back here..
I'm concerned I'll look like a hooker on new years eve in this outfit
There are different standards on new years eve. To look like a hooker you literally need to be giving a guy head on the street while he's handing you cash.
Yep. It's going to be us, strippers, and drag queens.
A glittery, gay, heavily makeuped, scantily dressed clusterfuck.
Do I like my job? I just bought 1/2 oz of pot from my supervisor at work. At a discount. And he said, "pay me whenever."
But that background check said 51...Omg. If I hooked up with someone that's my dads age.....
I believe the question is can one ever have too many vibrators?
I pretended to be blind and he pretended to be my assistant and long story short, we had to buy that bra and panty set, and now we're both banned from Victoria's Secret AND I have a cum stained demi cup.
dude, shes trippin so bad. idk what shes on, she just told me she doesnt remember her name then proceeded to get in the shower clothed to try to "rinse off the high"
You know your life has gone off the rails when waking up in a Spanish hospital with alcohol poisoning and no memory of how you got there is not even your top wildest drinking story.
Randomize
