not only are you not the girl i fell in love with, but from the looks of it, you ate her
absolutely not. he will always be that kid that threw up a ham and cheese sandwich in fourth grade to me.
I got a Cease & Desist email from NBC for downloading Bruno. I am not going down for gay porn.
how the hell did u puke all over the magazines... do u still want me to keep them
Are you being sarcastic? I can't tell this time because you're in the hospital.
Nothing like hearing a USA chant while getting head. God bless America.
I pretty much just threw a bunch of clothes and my vodka in a bag..idk where I'm gonna end up tonight but I'm prepared.
There was a community pot of Ramen, and if you were in the pool you were either fully clothes or ass naked.
We tried to line dance with everyone but it turned into drunken stumbling and attempting to grind on random frat boys. I feel that this might turn into an every Thursday thing.
my throat is bruised, my back is scarred, my vagina feels like it's going to fall off.. you're like godzilla. you destroy everything.
I mean I only got hit in the ass with ONE firework
And my cousin was so drunk he called an uber and instead he got into a cop car and they took him to the hospital
Your "whiskey dick" is glorious but also terrifying
Only I could turn my one night stands into class essays. Go me.
HE LIVES IN ANOTHER STATE
actually scratch that last text, he's the perfect boyfriend. He stays faithful and doesnt find out about all the guys here. it's a win-win
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