She's JV to your varsity
...so how do you feel about living with a lesbian next year?
hhaha i just laughed out loud when i read that
is that a "i laughed because im fine with it" or "im a republican" ?
i'm at the st pattys day thing. the bar is packed. they just put on celine dion its all coming back to me now. i'm screaming the words.
it's 1 pm.
I miss your penis. And I totally say this as a friend. I just miss it because it's great. You should be very proud of it.
Do you remember calling yourself Captain Cockblock and openly giving out everyones sexual history? Because you did.
Didn't know what to wear so I ripped off my bed sheets and tied myself a toga. "a little hungover" is no way to describe me right now.
donating our bodies to science does not justify what were doing to them.
Which one of you fuckers thought itd be funny to see if the kitchen table can float.
We told her to calm down. She said "I'm Buddha!". Then army crawled to the cooler for more vodka.
I'm two sheets to the sexual wind
Uh yeah can we get an age of consent check on Dave's penis?
Age of consent, Dave's penis. Thank you...
I have this rep as a wingman for a reason. I'm like a poon caddy. "You might want to use a 9 iron on this hole. "
I need a genital shamwow being this wet.
Pretty sure we ruined a bachelorettes life last night
where are you guys?
stoned at his house watching water boil
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