He spelled "beautiful" wrong in his text
btw, but what hole was i in last night? wanna know if i have to worry
So Ive been fucking her for the past couple months and i just found our that my grandfather and her grandmother were fuck buddies for a while. I feel like this is a new awesome family tradition that skips a generation.
i think my love is proven by the fact that i still want to have sex with you after this conversation
I should start handing out wavers before I have sex with someone. 1. Do you have anything to do tomorrow? 2. Are you ok with sleeping 12 hours from exhaustion. 3. Are you ok with a limp?
So he texted me two hours ago to tell me he just took two hits of acid. Now he's asking me if it's possible for a house to breathe.
I'd apply for another job, but "staring out windows crying" is not a hot qualification right now.
You went in the back with her.. And honestly I couldn't tell her neck from her tits man..
Twist to Josh's story, he had a gyro in his hand and never dropped it even after he got knocked the fuck out
Pregnancy test = positive. Hope you still have our old guess who game 'cause daddy elimination begins now.
Tbh I would eat a grilled cheese off your dick.
He just ate a tooth whitening strip...
I did crash a prom last night though.. It was fun
Are you sure you found YOUR underwear?
So I'm buying milk, bread, yogurt & lube. Not awkward at all
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