do you know how bad I want you right now?
As bad as i want you to stop texting me?
is that a hint?
I told my rommate that he was pissing on his bed. He said "ok man" and took a step backwards and continued. He then went back to bed.
Chicago was legit, ate some badass pizza and gave a cig to a crackhead..its all i thought it would be
Is it obsessive that I keep picking my crazy sex rug burn scab so it leaves a scar I can remember him by?
Oh god. I asked to "play his sexaphone" which I though was a super sex way to say "let me blow you". He fucking walked home at 4:30am
AT THIS RATE YOU WILL HAVE FUCKED MORE OF MY CLOSE FRIENDS THAN I HAVE PEOPLE PERIOD BY VALENTINE'S DAY.
TOUCH YOURSELF. DO IT.
I don't think that's how you're supposed to sext
I wasn't an ass in college so much more like I showed my ass a lot especially during serious beerpong games. You know I don't fuck around when it comes to sports.
ok thanks goodnight
Also before you go to bed i just have to get it out there that i really like macklemore as a person
I am slightly proud of the fact his mom turns on the dryer located behind the spare bedroom EVERY time we visit!
My friends son got stung by a jellyfish over the weekend and we seriously stood there debating on whether or not we should pee on this toddler.
I will forever remember this as The Great Jalepeno Cock Burn of 2014.
he bit THROUGH my nipple
plus side, no need to pay for a piercing.
I'm pretty sure i doubled the number of dicks I've ever touched, last night.
Fuck this virus. We’re finally back on campus but the bars suck parties are banned sports are canceled we eat in our rooms and can’t fucking hangout with anyone. I’m tired of virtual classes and involuntary celibacy
OMG IKR! It’s not college unless we’re puking in a toilet wondering if we’re pregnant or just hungover!
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