Whats up?
Drunk as a mother trucker with panties on her thumbnail..laying thee down
Stay up. I'm coming home in a little
Ill try..hurry!!!! Thine hour awaits you
those bitches were sniggering at my man-pris like they were goddesses of fashion!
...dude i pray you are quoting something, someone, anyone...
Alex, there's no such thing as a fancy sex store.
he told me my hair look so beautiful and as he was stroking it his fingers got caught in my BUMPIT. How are you supposed to explain that one?
its freezing days like this when i seriously consider littering to speed up the global warming processes.
Yeah. We was talkin. Its ok. My bed is too filled with pam for sex. Its like a slip and slide of butter product.
I am more sore today than I was after my car wreck. Take it as a compliment that you bang harder than a semi-truck.
I almost punched the night nurse in her face. I woke up and she was standing over me.
He's going to regret telling me he doesn't care if i shave or not...
Phone sex soon? I mean date. Sex date. Date phone.
all 3? possibly?
I think I'm up to the challenge.
If you don't let me come over I'm gonna call you on speaker and you have to listen to her scream and moan too
I've discovered my ability to crush a man's ego is greater than my hate for beer.
Just in case the world ends tomorrow, I have an emergency contact group of booty calls I can send a quick "let's fuck" to before I die.
My lease is up and I've been thinking, it's only fair that the guys I've fucked in this apartment in the past year help me move. They enjoyed the bed, now help me move it.
I’m looking forward to our Cougar years. These freshmen know how to fuck
Randomize
