Pussy?
how
Wat do u mean how?
If your pregnant with his baby maybe we can start getting weed for free.
You can't just hum the Jaws theme song when you pull down my pants.
He told me he's not in to anal. I need to marry him, ASAP.
He threw me out a window and then threw raw ground beef at us. Normally you'd hate someone for that, but that guy's great.
Great. Woke up in Ts room wearing one sock, a glove and a beret with a sorrority chick CLEARLY out of my league. Jose Cuervo you ARE a friend of mine.
He titled his birthday party on facebook, "BJ's in PJ's- an adult slumber party." I'm the only one invited.
Just to update you. I am dead. So your probably gonna have to find a new roommate
Who the fuck cries when they're stoned?!
Sorry man I just really wanted a McChicken
So please don't worry, but I need some help getting blood out of my drywall so I can get my security deposit back. I would not ask if the need was not great.
I told you that you should stop drinking and you responded "Thanks for telling me how to live, North Korea!"
I just don't wanna be that girl with no ride and no pants
Yeah, I've hit on priests at bars, too. Such a shame, there are a lot of hot men out there who've devoted themselves and their glorious genitalia to the Lord -_-
Is it weird to smoke a bong with a client from work?
I fit in backpacks. BOOM HERE I AM! Like a stripper from a cake.
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