And if you don't call me, I will embarrass you publicly with a can of spray cheez.
You were absolutely insistent that the entire bar knew that it was peanut butter jelly time
I was just wished a Happy Valentine's Day by the (Mexican) Chinese food delivery guy. I've never had clearer "get your life together" message than that.
Why the fuck is the royal wedding at 4am. That is obviously not the most appropriate time to drink during finals. It's like I'm bound to fail, by royal decree.
i didnt have any regrets until i found out he was a freshman.... and the only reason he got into yale was because of soccer... and he wasnt premed.
Oh my god. I'm not ready to be an adult. I'm not ready.
One guy got his nose broke and was playing with it. Then another guy was playing beer pong off his horse.
This is how baked we were last night. Our drinking game: We stare at each other; first one to laugh drinks.
You were fine, but your knee injury definitely came from interpretive dancing like a gay fairy with lead wings all around the Mission St BART. Everyone thought you were on drugs.
I think weed is turning my hair brown
i woke up inside a girl that i promised i would take on a date to Chili's
Oh boy I hope we come out of this alive. And with clean prison records
Listening to The Little Mermaid soundtrack should cure my drunkeness right?
That's brilliant but could get us arrested. Give me shots until I shout LET'S DO THIS
Mid thrust, say hold on I need a pic for my friend.
Randomize
