I am doing a scientific study and i need a brief description of the underpants you are wearing
Nevermine. I'm just going to tell you on Myspace with a glitter graphic.
Last night I got a napkin with 4 names & numbers: Katie, Ellen, Kylie...and Brandon.
Three questions. How does a tomato drive a car, how does an asparagus play a guitar, and how am I still so high that I chose to watch Veggie Tales?
Pretty sure I just slept with Elmo.
He yelled "HERE COMES THE WARMTH" before he pissed his pants. In front of the whole party.
And then the cop told me my court date was on 4/20. I said come onn u really gunna do me like that
Okay, thats embarrasing even by my standards and I've thrown up while wearing a viking hat. just a viking hat.
i was staring at it trying to desperately see a vagina
We were fucking on his hammock and right as he came we flipped over. I landed on him, he landed on a pile of pinecones. We're done with nature sex.
I just wanted to give you a heads up. There's a crab in the kitchen. He doesn't have a name yet. We are just calling him crab for now. Oh! and we have memosas!
It was one of those you-have-no-other-way-home-and-we-already-made-out-so-I-guess-youre-coming-home-with-me-if-you-promise-to-leave-early kind of deals.
I guess my vagina missed him because it called and left a 5 min. message. Color me impressed
I couldn't figure out what was more important, finishing the shot or putting out the fire on my leg.
Maybe those shots of hot dog water wasn’t a good idea after killing a fifth of tequila.. but who’s askin
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