and that's when the elephants and penises started dancing on the ceiling
i stapled my math hw together with an ear ring, too ghetto?
woke up in a freezing tub of water at 6 am again. probably should stop the drunk baths
so the party was at my house but some how i ended up being the only one who slept outside
You told me you loved me after I brushed your teeth with my index finger.
It's great having no responsibilities. In normal life I would be freaking the fuck out right about now. But the only worry I have from last night is where i got this shower caddy full of cookies. God I love college.
Last thing I remember is beer bonging sangria. Dear God.
So update from last night: I made friends with a coke dealer, I tore the card scanner off the wall of my dorm, and I passed out on our bathroom counter with my head in the sink.
Finally washing the shoe scuff marks off my front windshield :( bye bye memories
Besides you're a Tennessee fan and it'd be against my religion to have your penis inside me today.
Idk she didn't seem that weird to me but I had just eaten an entire tray of jello infused with liquor so I could be wrong...
I got custody of our girlfriend in the breakup.
just like cleaning my room and being more organized in my life. more so just making sure a toaster doesn't end up in my car again for 2 months
Roomies told me I showed up to my house alone with no pants on and burrs in my hair... I live in the middle of the city
Don't tell me I can do whatever makes me happy while also saying I have to put on pants.
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