You wanna call me after your homoerotic shower?
i was so high last night that i actually googled "how to get un high"
if you ask that question again our friendship is over
Lady next to me is getting american flags airburshed on her nails. god bless the ghetto.
I just had to explain to my father, how having two screens plugged into my computer doesn't use more internet.
I hope the kids appreciate the fact that I jizzed on her instead of on their slide.
whatever a "slut portfolio" is, mine is apparently almost complete
yea, their son has been arrested on more than one occassion, their daughter is pregnant and their other daughter graduated but she was adopted, so clearly genes are everything.
I want to break up with him.....but he has a george forman grill...like I need that
He just turned 21, it's very obvious the end of their relationship is near. Now we play the waiting game.
she scratched her sororities letters into my back when she was done. i think i was part of some sick game. sick twisted sexy game
I mean it's not my fault he had a floor mat that read "put out or get out". What was I supposed to do?
thank god we only have to drink eggnog and rum once a year. It taste like shit.
He was like Sweeney Todd... But, without the killing people part.
So... He's a barber?
No. He's got crazy hair, and a revenge fetish. But he's hot. Does that make up for it?
just once i'd like to actually BE there for your crazy drunk stories instead of just getting the play-by-play by people who can't remember half of it
Talking to a customer about getting high and staring at glow in the dark wheels while there is a cop in the store. Just another day in Tampa
Randomize
