White coat. Heels.
perhaps when you are drinking red wine from a tall glass with a straw it is time to call it a night.
the last 2 times weve had drunk sex ive had to get the morning after pill.. he's turning into a real expensive fuck buddy.
she had no gag reflex. and is an abercrombie model. i love college.
The saltiness of my tears mix perfectly with the tequila.
Ive been using palmolive to shower with for he last week, dont tell me about not having money. Im heading to the bar r u going.
I fell asleep masterbating while watching family guy... This is what happens when girl's night gets canceled
yo knit me an eyepatch. but also make it usable as a thong
I'm kinda surprised he wouldn't be honored to take me back as a fuck buddy.
well you don't shave your pubes into a handlebar mustache and keep the party to yourself
Dude, we got to the strip club as they were closing, and you starting crying because, and I quote, "This is the closest to birthday sex I'm gonna get."
I woke up to some strange woman rubbing peanut butter on my thighs
I got all the way to work before I realized there were Trojans in my bra.
Joke’s on you. I got to talk to a furry about why nukes are bad and why musicals are good.
I just want to see you and express my feelings in a drunken manner, but in a sweet way like my english accent.
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