Skip Greektown and come to Geektown. I just want to cuddle.
tfor prom could you pick me up wo bottles of champagne and a condom, please?
maybe tonight we can turn coloring into a drinking game
You covered in salsa con queso would take care of all of my cravings right now
make sure you eat your skittles last so when you barf you can barf RAINBOWS.
I'm glad you enjoy my eating disorder so much.
Tonight we are playing Scuba-Keg. Getting keg now. I'll explain when i get home.
She's pissed. She declared she was moving out and proceeded to pack 3 pairs of shoes, her electric wine opener and ONE sock. Then told us to have fun paying her portion of the rent.
I'm not upset because i like you. I'm upset because I can't use you for the sex anymore.
At the party. I feel like I just walked into a lifesize blunt.
What's it called where you go to the stripclub with two guys that have both gone down on you...
Tuesday
Do you think next time you could control the yawn? Kind of a buzzkill to be mid-orgasm and see you yawning over there.
Happy you have kids and I don't day!
I need ecstasy. And, before you ask, the answer is yes right now
I didn't even get crazy off of the coke so everything's fine. Also, I think I might have killed my aunt's dog..
Roommate charged out of his room in pajamas yelling "MAKE IT RAIN" and just threw $4,000 in fifties onto my head. My Friday night.
Randomize
