No, you can still breathe under the balls.
we were having sex and the sweat made her make up run... seriously laid there and watched her face just melt into ugly.
So... on the count of three, we are going to forget last night ever happened... 1...2...3
I feel like today should be a " im going to have sex with you cause its raining and theres nothing else to do" kinda day
Why would I send you a picture of it when I could just steal the gnome and put it in your bed with you? Admit it, he looks just like gnomeo!
Im playing lifeguard in my own bathroom. How's ur night?
I thi k this dude I fcken showed up to the bar in a raisins shirts. I thought I was better than that. Fuckkkk.
"But puppies!" Is not an acceptable excuse for trying to drunkenly steal someone's dog, you promiscuous midget!!
We need to do something soon. I need like 4,000 beers and a cigarette.
So i stood up out of the sunroof while he gave me oral. Car was still moving. Exactly how illegal is that?
If I don't quit picking up guys when I'm drunk, I'm going to need a vagina transplant.
Would you think less of me if I said I was eating a toaster strudel in the bath.
Is it weird that I was turned on when he told me he had a vasectomy?
I knew you two would hit it off
short story short, i just screamed anal seepage in the middle of a diner.
That’s all I need in life: vibrators, butt plugs, strawberry lube, and sour gummies
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