never. drinking. again.
lets not get ahead of ourselves.
it's kind of nice to have a picture of me making out with someone and actually know who it is for once
THEY HAVE A VOMIT TROUGH.
What?
A TROUGH FOR VOMIT.
I need to stop taking drags of other peoples cigarettes, it's such a tease. Like playing just the tip, you just can't
We're learning about the color wheel. Hello college.
ill be fine wheb you get back. I'm gunna do real world things like washing the dishes. having to perform serious tasks brings you down.
he was spitting whole peanuts projectile out of his mouth at the waitresses as they walked by and then yelled across the restaurant that he had "no problem kicking any of their asses"
I'm surprised, it's been so long you must be starving
At a certain point, the zombie-like hunger goes away. Then the sadness sets in. Then you start lying to yourself that you're taking some "me time." Then you remember you dodged chlamydia and Buddha knows what else. Then you're at peace with it.
Nothing like sitting at your midterm pissed at yourself because you put your graphing calculator batteries in your vibrator and forgot to put them back in before the exam 😑
We were totally high while having sex, I told him fast or slow, just follow your balls. That was a show stopper.
I ate her out and told her she tasted like pumpkin pie. She screamed that she hated pumpkins and started to cry
Dude, my back STILL hurts from carrying the team on BP last night.
Got upgraded to First Class and now I’ve got the whole Pacific Ocean to seduce the very hot gentleman sitting next to me!!! Door closing, wish me luck!
Bro I rebuilt the dungeon in animal crossing visit me
Broooo
one of my students asked me today if i was having a baby. fuckin 4 year olds and their lack of filter. time to get back to the gym i guess
Randomize