I want to walk on stilts...naked
so last night after we hooked up i got my period and woke up this morning with a blood stain on his bed and not only was it huge but i had put my jeans back on before bed so i took the walk of shame with period stained pants
If you liked it then you shoulda put your dick in it, oh uh uh oh
I am wasted and people are fist pumping. This should not happen on the west coast.
we were wasted and he didn't have a condom so he called the front desk and asked for one. They didn't "officially" have them but the night manager happened to have one in his wallet. He brought it to the room with two mints.
have to get expensive furniture. after that study abroad now at least six things at ikea are named after guys i slept with
I've been timing it. He's been showering alone for 33 minutes. 4 minutes ago, he said "truth or dare." haven't heard anything since.
yes i am an adult who snuck out of my parents house to cuddle with a guy and then came home and listened to taylor swift. judge me all you want.
I think I just got judged by the pizza guy. dude, you deliver fucking pizza. you need rethink YOUR life.
Just walked by the neighbors and they are definitely butt naked sitting on a bed, watching Netflix, baked out of their minds, with the blinds open.
Welcome to Bellingham.
I think I ingested my vampire fangs last night.
I agree and I would be an awesome dog
I'm never going to adult. I'm staying a child. The only thing related to adult that I want to do is you.
I found your birth control, it was in your Crown Royal bag.
I'm just happy stripping was the reason you fractured your hand
Randomize
