Good news! Whoever used this stall at Target earlier...not pregnant!
Yeah..And after he fingered me, he wiped it on my face and laughed.
ew wtf
you insisted on breathalizing me with a inhaler.
I'm bringing in a picture of a stranger on facebook to get my haircut. I have reached a new level of creepy.
I'm hoping to finish this bottle of wine before I pass out, I don't want the remainder spilling on my white down comforter.
From the prices on this menu it looks like I have no choice. I have to blow him.
you cant just puke in an arbys and not order food. thatd be rude.
Just found a peacock feather in my car. Should I be the least bit concerned about this?
Started with us just having a beer. Now Ivan lit a torch to walk to the store, Ben smashed a 26 in the parking lot, and they're throwing broken shot glasses. Fratio Friday is something.
I'm sorry I compared your vagina to nascar
WHO THE FUCK TAGS THEMSELVES AT COUNTY JAIL?!?!
thanks for not telling him i named my trumpet after his dick
No one ever gets any after sleeping with her. She is like the broken mirror of hookups, enjoy 7 years of blue ball. Don't say I didn't warn you
Full disclosure. I fucked the fatty from work and shit is weird now.
He thought reverse cowgirl meant he dressed up as a cowgirl. Honestly, it was more creepy than funny
Randomize
