I know man...but i cant pass up a catholic school girl fantasy
I had five suicidal voicemails from him when I woke up this morning. They all started and ended with "DON'T FUCK MY ROOMMATES".
It was only one, it doesn't count.
Sorry about your blender, your tiolet, your weed, and your dog...
I'm eager to hear this explaination.
I know i'm the slutty cousin, but be honest. have you ever got your nose ring caught on a guy's zipper?
throwing up turkey will be a nice break from throwing up ramen
it was pretty much a given that i would lose my thong on dollar tequilla shot night
hey, sorry about all the butter. I thought it was gonna help.
Dude she gave you head while I was in the closet, we've passed the "awkward" phase.
I have a theory he's part Neanderthal
BTW my friend remembers her as "the one with the pronounced chin"
Faking my way through an entire party as a British exchange student. Wish me luck.
Gonna be hard to top last New Year's Eve when the guy I blew came at midnight
Its amazing how creative youll get when your house has been out of toilet paper for a week and a half
I think my moral compass just broke
To describe how high he was he said, " I'm cocked out of my ape sandwich" so yes...that was some pretty good weed.
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