I need a slap back to reality. Or at least a slap back to homosexuality
At what point did we cease to have vaginas?
Sometime in the sweat pants phase freshman year.
i just saw an ambulance and a fire truck pull away from the dorms. it appears somebody actually IS feeling shittier than me today.
it was a sick party until you insisted on putting on "that's how I beat shaq"
I fucked him in the bathroom at Cedar Point. if it hadn't been for me already combining my two favorite things in the world the whole bathroom thing would have been a little disgusting.
I just want you to know if you wake up tomorrow morning and wreak of mustard, I was not involved.
She went home with him because he works at Jimmy John's and his car "smelled like meat"
HE THREATENED ME WITH A CACTUS. WHERE DID HE EVEN GET A CACTUS.
i would have thought, that you two being my best friends, one of you would have atleast tried to catch me before i hit the ground after blacking out.
I JUST WANT TO HAVE MILDLY SOCIALLY ACCEPTABLE SEX WITH HIM AND CALL HIM CUPCAKE.
Stop trying to get a gf and raw dog some forest beasts like sasquatch
So it's national ass day?! I love October. No bra last Saturday and now ass day. This is my month. God is dedicating this October to me!
I guess? According to Jeff his mom is wondering when the grand babies will arrive. So I don't think they like ME so much as my supposed functioning uterus
I went over to help her build a porch, but we decided that was too much work, so we just got high and watched Scooby Doo
I thought I was at a rave until the paramedics started chasing me. You win again tequila.
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