Only in Montana can you find Septic Services that would display "Christian owned and operated" on the side of the truck. I'm oddly going to miss this state.
im trying to make cookies in the george foreman
well he has a gf so if he picks me up tonight i'll only him finger me
Fuck buddy has no power. Invited her over to use my shower. I love hurricaines.
dude i have an english essay and a bio lab due tomorow
so basically your not goin out tonight?
who said that?
and then he proceeded to take what he called, a whip cream shower.
the bar told me i would have to take an hour break so they could wash the shot glasses
The a/c is broken so they cut a softball size whole in the freezer door. Goodbye deposit.
Oh my god. I just realized something amazing. If I get pregnant with a boy, that technically means I have a penis right??????
This is what my life has come to. Drinking champagne alone yelling at the dog because no one wants to hang out with me
God dammit not the cupcake channel. Not when I'm high.
I am in the bathroom at work, pooing while eating pretzels. Hungover Fridays are in full effect
Was your wine and cheese snap taken from the toilet?
When i was tripping hard i was banging Jeff's roommate and her room turned into Hogwarts
Also when we were banging i thought my high school librarian was perched up on top of the stereo like a gargoyle but it ended up just being her cat
Needless to say, I did not go home with him cause he kinda resembled a guppy fish.
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