spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
I need to remember that good judgment goes out the window after the 7th shot and the 3rd Lady GaGa song.
no guy is ever going to take you seriously as a potential marriage prospect unless you learn to swallow
My epitaph should read "Margaritas: she never learned"
there are way too many $1s in my wallet for last night to have been 'tame'
sometimes you have to go after what you want
true. and i really want to cum
it's great music for shaving your balls
he said that weed should be legal but that particular bong shouldn't be. i stared at a clock for an hour and a half after i ripped. so logically, i completely agree.
Every once in a while you'd chuckle to yourself, and when I asked you what's so funny u replied "sometimes my toes tickle eachother"
At 4 am, making my walk of shame, the hotel security followed me to my car with his flashlight shined directly on me. I felt like either a criminal or like I was about to get raped. Can't a girl sneak out of a hotel room without an actual spotlight on her?!?!?!
We had car sex in the parking lot of the dispensery while he blasted Tony Bennett. It was so fucking romantic.
Just talked a homeless guy out of suicide. Was rewarded with a garbage bag full of mountain dew bottles and zannies. Im such a good person
I told the guy that if he didn't put enough pepperoni to earn the name " pepperoni feast", that I was gonna sue him for all he had. Believe it or not, that's all I remember.
I know you've been in hospital with meningitis, but last night I walked into a streetlight and bruised my penis so who's really suffering here
i don't want him to see me in a bathing suit.
hasn't he seen you naked?
well yeah, but it's different in a bathing suit.
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