Your tits are I can't wait for
Taylor Swift is so right about you.
I seriously love my fucking boobs. They are so boobs.
I was just standing there and then BOOM! She was attacking my face with her mouth.
I don't get it, man. She treated me like a sexual predator but treated you like a piece of meat.
The guy I was getting with last night took off his purity ring mid-sex and threw it across the room.
she just took adderol and chased it w dog water
I'm just saying, asking "Are you happy with me?" during a handjob is simply unfair and scientifically inadmissiable.
I will start puting down the plastic for the vom in our love chamber. If you want to be something or someone else for the night feel free. The theme is shit show.
I'm there.
I should start handing out wavers before I have sex with someone. 1. Do you have anything to do tomorrow? 2. Are you ok with sleeping 12 hours from exhaustion. 3. Are you ok with a limp?
just go where the car takes you. fingers crossed its here with breakfast.
I woke up in a sink... Not like curled up on top of it though. I was standing, bent over, face first. IN THE DAMN SINK.
I got another blow job proposal last night. Skills.
You have not lived until you've puked on your sequined UGGs in the Rite Aid parking lot while going to buy emergency contraceptives.
Yep if he's taking selfies he's probably on drugs again.
i think ive been high everyday since ive met you
Randomize
