My e-date is really photogenic. Real-life not so much
Do you think they'll have a special part during the BET awards for Michael Jackson even though he turned white?
I will also inform you that stairs change when you change a house. Those hurt.
It's going to be great. They guy at the store said 3 shots and you won't be able to feel your face or stop smiling.
I blacked out after the shots of canned lobster bisque.
When you wake up in your dorm right outside your room with the key in the door, then you will understand my pain.
i just complicated the hell out of my summer by fucking him this early on
just watched a cripple ollie in his wheelchair to get on to the elevated floor in the bar. I. LOVE. WISCONSIN
After your flask fell out of your leg brace and you told your RA that it was juice, you tried to unlock your dorm room but your key was attached to your bra so he ended up seeing your boobs
I vaguely recall putting a toaster in the freezer.
I know you like got hit by a car but do you want to come to my birthday pardi
Every time Brady gets sacked I cum a little...
well apparently i sat in the bathroom staring in the toliet at my vomit. it was blue. how was your night?
I have a whole new respect for her. She chugged half a bottle of jack daniels, and then peed all over his wall. Serves him right.
After everything I’ve done… had sex with people off tinder, gone to clubs and bars, gone to hockey games…. I get Covid at GRANDMAS HOUSE
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