A relator touring our house this week saw the picture in our bathroom of steven passed out, yellow faced, with BALLS on his forehead, and had to ask "if that kid was alive or dead".
It's going to be great. They guy at the store said 3 shots and you won't be able to feel your face or stop smiling.
She's the only one so far who hasn't laughed at me naked.... I'm gonna marry her.
I wish i had more things to dip in ranch... That's the most stoner thing i've ever said
Look on the bright side. Now you know the number for poison control.
We are going to get clementines. And shoot them out of a ballon launcher. That's after we come up to the ivy with a bullhorn and reck havoc. Where are you.
I actually took a sword out of your hands. You were samurai slashing lemons to make chasers.
It's hard to judge what a reasonable amount of cereal looks like in the spaghetti pot. We're out of cap'n crunch and milk.
Will i get arrested If i steal the salvatiion arny guys bell for ringing it to close to my hangover
We dug deep emotionally while eating cereal
No more weed for you
My roommate walked in naked grabbed my hand and pulled me into her room to see her randoms dick.
You rubbed a frozen pizza in my face. The concerning part was that it was semi cooked from our body heat
She was wearing American flag underwear. How could I NOT fuck her?
You're a true patriot.
I'm shrooming way too hard to deal with your bullshit at this particular point in time
I AM OFFICIALLY LICENSED TO BE A LESBIAN
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