so evidently yelling "gay" everytime your bf tells you how he feels is cause for breakup. news to me
Thong +tight pants =hungry butt. Not a good look on big women! Walmart sucks.
you would pick up someone in the library
when your hometown is famous for abortion clinic bombings, hurricanes, and jude law's newest bastard, its probably time to move.
you ever feel like there is a sober person insided you pointing and laughing....?
It was like a secret agent hookup. No names, swift execution, get in- get out.
She's gonna be fat in the future. On a side note I had a "It's not you, it's me." conversation with a bottle of jack last night.
He broke into my apartment to check his Facebook again, the beer is all gone, and there's a new high score on pac man.
I have so much boob sweat I could bathe a baby
Slip and slide hallway was not one of my better ideas.
Was he good-huge or like "what the fuck do i do with this"-huge
I enjoy the level of friendship we have achieved until you ask me to determine what may or may not be gentile warts via iphone pic
God doesn't care if you're a paramedic, you can't do that to someones cat and still get into heaven
I'm seeing how far I can grow my leg hair out before Jason will say anything. I'm up to an inch
it's like i'm your dad, but instead of reminding you to bring your lunch to school i remind you to take a good long hit from your bong.
Randomize
