He can hate all he wants but were fucking with these crocs on
He has some good qualities. Beneath the layers of asshole and fat.
so while trying to be a healthier drunk i discovered that putting airborne in natty is not an advisable decision
It was like a little tadpole swimming in the big ocean.
Wella between the drunkards, the inevitable slutty costumes, and someone doing a BODY SHOT OFF A PREGNANT GIRL, i lost my halloween spirit. Bah humbug.
Your penis chewing exercise is not working
her wearing orange crocs at the bar was definitely a great form of contraception
I can't tell if I'm still on the hangover from last night, or if I'm experiencing the one from tomorrow, because it was so powerful that it actually traveled back through time...
Seeing your boyfriend, side piece, and great white buffalo, all in one night? Its a sign right?
Proceed with caution.
Yeah but if you conceived a child on a park slide that would be pretty awesome
Three of my exes and one of my exes' brothers have hit me up and it's only been a week. I hate semester break.
I want sex. When is an appropriate time post funeral to ask for something like that. Like when it gets dark out?
i don't care if you are my best friend. does not give you the right to describe how well my sister gives blowjobs.
how about your cousin?
Your sister walked upto me in the middle of the hallway and was like get us beer or shes never having sex with you ever again, wtf
I'm sittin in my Hawaiian shorts watching the office eating cold asparagus. wow do I suck when you're not here.
Randomize
