You're the only chick there. That's not an orgy, that's called a gang bang...
Being a girl sucks.
Being a boyfriend sucks for about a week, too
No now hes going to beat me to our goal of getting someone to have sex in the library. I hate periods.
I don't know what to judge you more for.
this is really not the time to pretend we have morals
You better be watching. There will be a POP quiz. Each correct answer gains you 5 more minutes of the sexual act of your choice
whatever, you made your decision to be a responsible student and where did it get you? a pushed back exam and no blowjob.
i wish i coudl send you meat via computure
I need someone to meet me at the end of the road and throw captain morgan at my face like they do with water at marathons
He's basically like a fancy dildo that buys me dinner.
FYI, Sammie and I made the executive decision that we're getting a pet octopus and keeping it in the ballpit. Just thought you should know.
antibiotics and champagne: breakfast of champions
My kids are NEVER playing in the park more than 2 feet away from me until they are capable of punching an eagle.
just once I'd like to not pass out before we leave the designated pre-drinking place
So I love answering sex questions in intimate relationships class on a clicker when im sitting next to my cousin..
what do u think we would be doing right now if we were together
Urinating on unicorns
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